Why do women put so much emphasis on one single day in the rest of their lives? I see so many brides planning their weddings while on the verge of vomiting from the stress. A friend of mine actually spent the week after her wedding in a sleep coma because her body couldn't handle the burden being lifted after its yearlong stay on her shoulders.
Not to mention, all this emphasis on the details of the wedding ... the material things ... takes the focus from the true reason for the day: you, and the person standing across from you at the altar/podium/arch/whatever. The second you put more importance on the color of the table linens, you've established your investment in the relationship you're committing to. Some may think this statement is a bit overboard on my part, but I find the wedding day to be a metaphor to the future.
The way you react to your wedding and the expectations you have of it reveal your true character. We had a small wedding of 60 people. About an hour shy of the end of the reception, our DJ's primary job had a crisis he had to attend to so he packed up. We saw this as an opportunity to call the reception quits early so we could get out to Bonaventure cemetery before it closed at 5pm. Yes, I went to a cemetery on my wedding day. I wanted a chance to visit my grandma at the family plot. We even took along two of the white kalanchoes in silver buckets that had graced the tables of the reception. The second we walked out the door of the reception, the rain started pouring (as it tends to do in the South). But we headed out to the cemetery and left the plants with Grandma ... at a cemetery ... in the pouring rain ... in my white dress ... and it couldn't have been more perfect. To me.
Flexibility, compromise, adaptation ... all of these are necessary in a marriage. Which is why I cringe when I hear a bride say "I want my day to be perfect." Because nothing is perfect, and accepting that is crucial to a happy life.
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2 comments:
So true and very well said.
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